neopats:

[mom voice] targé

m0rphlne:

dang girl, you’ll make the prettiest flowers once your body rots into the earth.

eikvelniop:

u just gotta hav ur hand on ur boob sometimes

jesus h christ i need to get this paper done but i have -35325 motivation

misselizajanes:

it’s official velma dinkley started the mommy kink back in 2004

fattifatphat:

broken-skies-and-angel-wings:

This guy I was talking to was saying how women play sports just as well as men, and he said, “One time I was reffing a womens softball game, on the full moon, and -“ 

And I was like, ” Why does it matter that it was on the full moon?“ 

and he was like “Well, you know, the full moon… women on the full moon" 

and i was like ‘I don’t get it' 

and he was like “Periods" 

and he thought all women just get their periods on the full moon and i just thought it was really funny that he confused women with werewolves. 

Lycanthropy is a feminist issue

spankmehardbarry:

me when someone asks what my goals for the future are

darkfate7:

Everyday is leg day when you’re running from your problems

there is no sacrilege quite like chewing a piece of pizza just to spit it out